It’s a short one today just to say that I’ve been avoiding Bikram Yoga and people are noticing.
“We don’t see you in the classes anymore!”
Well, it’s simple, I’ve probably done all of 3 Bikram classes in the last 5 months.
I actually lose less hair by staying away. That is, I now have much more hair remaining on my head because I’m not exposing myself to the heat – I drop hair like crazy in the hot room.
But there are disadvantages like I don’t get to do toe stand anymore and camels are just as non-existent. Not that I liked camels, I hated them. And, I’m getting fat around my belly again. Hey ho. You win some you lose some.
So what am I doing instead? Yin and the occasional Vinyasa. On the upside my hips are opening up and my crow is getting better. I’m hating the chaturanga dandasanas but hey… you win some, you lose some!
I’m loving the yin though. Yesterday I fell asleep and only woke up to switch postures. Ahhhh my life feels so much more balanced when I do yin. Being a very yang person within my entire being, the yin actually helps a lot.
So yes, I’m starting to miss Bikram yoga. I don’t miss the heat, I miss the postures and feel like I’ve forgotten how to move my body in those ways (eg holding awkward pose). I probably won’t be able to do any of the postures when I go to a class.
Methinks it’s time to start looking at my posture progress again to see if having spent time away has made a difference. Curious to find out.
It all started 2.5 years ago when I made Tony some hair pomade for our anniversary.
It lasted a little over a year. It didn’t cost me much to make. Probably all of £3.00 if that, for 300g or maybe more. I don’t know ’cause I didn’t weigh it.
He looked at store bought pomade recently and it costs £32.00 for only 250g which is about half the size of my jars.
Truth be told, he loves my homemade pomade so much, he requested I make more when he ran out (instead of going to buy some). He preferred what I made to the gels and waxes he’d been using previously.
Why does he love it? Firstly, because it works but more importantly, when he sweats in yoga, it doesn’t sting his eyes at all and lastly, he reckons it makes his hair softer and cleared up all dandruff.
I love it because I can make it smell different each time.
I also love it because every time he bends over to kiss Rome, Rome will actually lick his hair!
It puts me at ease knowing that although it might be slightly bad for a rabbit to consume hair pomade (mixture of oils and beeswax), at least it’s all natural and even the rabbit isn’t put off by licking it!
Anyway, first it was hair pomade, then it was tooth paste, next thing you know, I just started DIY-ing all our products, as and when we ran out of them.
Usually I only have to make one item if at all, in any given week. Depending on the product, I could be making it every 3 weeks, every 3 months or in the instance of pomade, just once every year and a bit.
This week however EVERYTHING ran out. So each day, I have been making a DIY something or other.
I don’t mind. In fact, I LOVE knowing that we’re slowly but surely removing all harmful, toxic and unnecessary chemicals from our home.
The less chemicals we’re exposed to, the better!!
So what have I made this week?
Dish Washing Detergent (for hand washing dishes)
All purpose cleaning spray
Tooth Powder (instead of toothpaste)
To be honest, I can’t actually believe we’ve eliminated all store bought items of the above and I’m impressed with how easy they all are to make.
Best of all, they work better than the store bought ones AND whatever goes down our drain, isn’t feeding chemicals back to nature.
This is a real photo of our stove before and after I used my all natural DIY cleaning spray. All I used was the spray, a scourer and a cloth.
I really should have timed it but I’m pretty sure it was done in less than 10 mins. I don’t think our stove’s ever been cleaner.
Tony did some of his own DIY-ing too after I told him off. There’s nothing like the motivation of a grumpy wife to get you going especially when your motto is “A happy wife is a happy life!” 😉
The rabbits (ie Rome) have been chewing on their hutch at 4am and it echoes through our very quiet flat like a thunderous hammering on wood.
He (Tony) sleeps right through it. I don’t. The nights where I have slept through are the nights where the exhaustion of an accumulation of multiple sleepless nights has taken over.
At first, I was waking up because the rabbits were fighting.
These days, since we separated them, for the most part, we go to bed at 2am, I wake up at 4am because Rome has woken up and started biting the hutch and biting and pulling the cage bars back and forth to say “let me out!”
I then stay awake listening to all the wood-chewing and digging but cannot go back to sleep because of Tony’s snoring to go along with the rabbit noises.
Next thing you know, planes are starting to go overhead, birds are tweeting, neighbours are waking up and walking around getting ready for work and I’m still awake.
Tony gets out of bed at 7.30am-8.00am and that’s when I fall asleep from exhaustion and then am up again by 9am ready to do it all again.
I’ve been operating like this for weeks – a total of 3 hours broken sleep every night and by the Saturday that just passed, I lost my patience.
You see, Tony had purchased some metal frames to go onto the inner frame of the hutch a week ago. He was supposed to glue them on top of where the bunnies gnawed the wood so they wouldn’t be able to bite those areas of the hutch anymore.
He’s had these metal frames since Monday but he never glued them in because they were slightly too long to fit. He needed to trim the ends off and couldn’t find a way to do it.
He was going to get them cut at a local hardware store but they were closed when he visited. In the end, having a grumpy me encouraged him to find a different solution.
Turned out, all he had to do was cut into the metal with a blade and then snap the ends off (which is actually what I said to him on Monday – it just took him all week to figure out how).
He managed to do it though and on Sunday night, we had our first ever quiet night in the flat after 6 weeks. SERENITY AT LAST!!!
The bunnies couldn’t bite the metal and had to resort to biting their chew mats which are MUCH QUIETER!!
Although we went to bed at 1am, I woke up bright and bubbly at 7am!!! There’s nothing like sleeping through the night and getting twice as much sleep as normal to make one happy!!!
For a person who likes to sleep 8 hours. I can’t believe I’m saying that 6 hours sleep straight is FANTASTIC.
The Mouth Guard
I finally got my mouth guard. All £300 of it. It better last forever!!! I grind my teeth so hard at night that I’ve chipped 2 teeth and keep chewing holes through my mouth guards so the dentist suggested something a bit stronger and hence, more expensive.
I picked it up on Monday afternoon from the dentist and on Monday night I had my first ever night’s sleep where I didn’t grind my teeth.
I have been grinding my teeth (that I’ve known of) since I was in my teens, that’s over 25 years of tooth grinding! Even my previous mouth guards allowed my jaws to clamp and chew against the guard.
This one however, stops my back teeth from meeting at all. EVER. Result? I didn’t sleep well. It was weird not being able to clench my teeth. Tuesday night however, I completely passed out.
I actually think it’s helping with my backaches. It’s as if relaxing my jaw while I sleep has allowed the rest of me to relax too. Will keep an eye on this as the weeks progress, it could just be a temporary result.
Vday was spent with Tony bringing home a bag of Ruffles (my favourite), me making him his hair pomade and us eating a Chinese takeaway dinner.
Don’t worry, the romance never died. That’s just how we roll.
V-day’s never been a thing for us and I hate that anyone spends money on flowers whose prices have been jacked up 3 fold just for the day.
WTF? Show me you care by saving your money!! Buy me flowers any other time, just not on Valentine’s day!!
We had a favourite Chinese place that closed a couple of years ago because the owner went back to live in Malaysia. We have never found another Chinese takeaway to replace it in standard and taste since.
So, we continue to try various places through Just Eat and Hungry House. I think we’ve found our close second last night. It’s called Man Ho!! LOL.
So now I can say we both had Man Ho for Valentine’s.
Paris & Rome
If I’m not talking about the bunnies, there’s something wrong. They are definitely my babies and consume the most part of my life.
I read up on everything rabbit each and every day, just so I can understand them better.
This week I learned that there are studies to show that the exact same places in a woman’s brain light up when she looks at pictures of her children as when she looks at pictures of her pet.
It seems the body does not know the difference and will trigger all the same emotions and hormones for motherly love for a pet as it does for children.
I think many pet owners who have loved and lost a pet will know what this is about because they’ve experienced it themselves. Pets really do become your best friends, your children, your family.
Apparently some people have actually said that they love their pet more than they do their partners!!!
Anyway, Paris & Rome are continuing to be happy bunnies and are still binky-ing. Though their hormones are making them a little irritable and unpredictable. If anything, I think the hormones exaggerate their personalities.
This week Paris has been more moody. One day he’ll be all ok to be around you and have you pet him (FINALLY) and the next day he is running away again, jumping in fright at every sound, hiding under the couch and avoiding every touch.
Rome has started to chew the skirting boards. I tell you nothing looks more stylish than some mangled skirting boards.
He cannot stop chewing and breaking things. I’ve given him cardboard, the chew mat, a quilt, more boxes, a chew toy but he continues to prefer to destroy the skirting boards instead.
I’ve given him hay and nuggets but they are only very temporary distractions until he’s breaking the skirting boards again. He managed to pull on one so hard, the nail came out and was sticking out dangerously sharp. I had to put him back in his hutch so I could hammer it back into the floor.
He also chases us when we go into the bathroom and starts digging at, biting or tugging our trouser legs as if to tell us we are not allowed to touch ANYTHING while in the bathroom.
Either that or that’s his way of telling us to get out.
I think he’s had enough of our cleaning up his poo. It’s ok though because he’s done very well with the litter tray and there’s not much territorial poo around.
This week, I bought an array of different kinds of hay to see which they like best. We’re spending money on their hay like we spend on superfood. Getting a bit OTT.
Forget the grass, get them the gourmet feeding hay with 3 types of plants for extra variety and nutrition! *part sarcasm*
Yes, I actually bought a bag just to test it out and am cringing that I have become one of those pet owners. God help us if we ever get a dog, I’ll probably cook all his food for him. None of that canned shit… he’s getting gourmet!
Anyway, back to the rabbits. I was trying to get away with some cheap stuff but most of it is dust at the bottom of the bag and they just don’t eat it all. In fact, they dig it, find the best bits, leave the rest, then poo and piss all over it.
We end up throwing most of it when they’re supposed to be eating it!
Not sure how this new hay will compare. It looks and smells better to Tony and I, it’s even green (as opposed to yellow) but it seems the bunnies think differently.
It costs twice as much but the bunnies are still treating it the same way as the cheap stuff. In fact, it looks as if they are not eating as much hay since the introduction of the new, more expensive stuff.
They don’t use it to pee on but they’re not eating it either. They kind of just leave it there. I wonder if they’re waiting for it to go yellow.
The bunnies seem to starve themselves (or eat skirting boards and cardboard boxes) until I give them nuggets. Still something to monitor for the coming months.
Perhaps they just need time to get used to the new flavours. Rabbits are actually very fussy eaters!
We also got them a new feeding toy which I’m more excited about than they are. You hide their treats in it and they have to learn things to get to them.
For example, they must lift a lid or push it aside to get to the treat. There are 3 different levels of difficulty.
Play time has never been more fun for me! Tony has caught me eating my dinner super fast just so I can go and play. I didn’t know I was doing it until Tony mentioned it and laughed at me for being such a kid.
Not the same for the bunnies though. Now they’re probably ok with it but at first it frustrated them… I could see it when they started biting the toy really hard, picking it up and slamming it down.
“WHY IS IT SO HARD TO GET TO AND EAT MY GODDAMNED TREATS??!!!”
They’re fast learners though so they both worked out the first level in under 5 mins. Actually, watching me attempt to put the thing together had Tony questioning if the learning toy was for rabbits or for humans.
The 2nd level they both figured out in under a minute. It takes me longer to put all the treats in and set it up than it does for them to eat. They’re like mini vacuum cleaners. They just inhale.
I’ve taken videos but doubt you’d want to watch 5 mins of a rabbit figuring out how to get to a treat so editing is required.
Yet another thing to add to my things to do. Let’s see if I can ever get a clip up of this “exciting” play time with the bunnies. No promises. I can barely even get a photo up of them.
Speaking of which…. this is another picture of when they used to get along. This is how rabbits hang out and chill together.
Arghhhh they’re SO CUTE!
I am just waiting for the day they can both be together like this again. We’ve got some neutering and re-bonding to do first…. furbaby parenting goals.
When you’re young, a day feels like eternity but it seems the older you get, 1 week goes by in a blink of an eye.
Highlights of the week:
A friend from Australia that I hadn’t seen for over a decade visited. She was in London for less than 24 hours but still managed to squeeze me in for a catch up.
I chose a restaurant near where she was staying. It was the German Gymnasium at Kings Cross. They serve… German food. Ha!
Anyway, it’s in a Grade II listed building and named German Gymnasium because the building was the first, purpose built Gymnasium in England with funding coming solely from London’s German community.
The building was built in 1865 so we ate dinner (I had a German afternoon tea) inside a 150 year old building.
Yin with Sharky
Yoga which has been my life for so long, was pretty non-existent because – January.
You have to book ALL your classes in otherwise they’re all full due to all those well-intentioned New Years Resolutions people who disappear by Feb.
I managed to book classes from mid Jan through to Feb and thought by February for sure, the classes would start being freer but it wasn’t to be.
So I have spent many days not going to yoga because the classes have been booked out and I hadn’t booked myself in, in time.
Can you imagine? Attempting to book yourself in 2 days in advance is still not long enough. FARK!
I did manage to get to one of Sharky’s first Yin classes and I loved it. She did a different method to the other teachers and allowed time for “rebound” between each posture.
Rebound is a savasana in between every posture to allow whatever released in each posture, to move through and exit or integrate into, the body.
The result? I ended up getting really teary and emotional. I actually felt emotions releasing from my body and I was so grateful to be able to feel them so I could let them go.
It only lasted a few seconds though because as soon as Tony saw me looking teary, “WHY ARE YOU CRYING?” came out of his mouth and it was so abrupt and harsh, I immediately cut off all emotions and went back to thinking mode.
I got skillz like that.
Actually, he managed to say it just like my mother used to. I know he said it out of concern but I heard it the way my mum said it which meant “Stop being a pussy, you have no reason to cry and if you don’t stop I’ll fucking give you a reason to cry.” That’s the mild version. 😉
So I stopped. IMMEDIATELY. I’ll just have to find a way to cry at times he’s not around so I can release emotions in peace.
Paris & Rome Another week in peace. Both boys are really happy and binky every day.
Paris does the cutest binkies ’cause he’s so chunky like a bulldog and bottom heavy. So he looks more like a jumping goat or ram when he binkies.
Rome has started to jump on my arm and shoulder. Last night he sat on my shoulder and every so often would turn to lick my face – cheek, eyelid, eyebrows, temple, forehead. Then he’d jump down and jump up onto my other shoulder and tug at my hair.
I know he’s just looking for a way over the fence and using me as a viewing platform but I like to think we’ve developed a good bond plus I’m loving all my bunny kisses! He loves kissing my nose.
He’s still incredibly mischievous, spends a lot of his time in meerkat position, listening out for what Paris might be doing and he’s completely chewed up the skirting board instead of the chew mat we gave him because he thinks breaking the skirting board will help him escape the fence.
We keep him fenced because although the more loving of the two, he’s also the trouble maker.
He is so curious he gets himself into all sorts of trouble – biting things he shouldn’t, falling off things he shouldn’t have jumped on in the first place and starting fights by annoying the crap out of Paris by not letting him have space.
The other day he fell down the stairs 3 times in one day (that I saw)all because he kept standing on 2 feet on the edge of the step and then leaning backwards. Don’t ask.
He’s been contained in the hallway with plenty of run space including the stairs and the bathroom but it doesn’t stop him from attempting to break the fence and looking for FREEDOM!!!
I’m also having a battle of the bathroom with him.
After a week of watching Tony and I go toilet (he’s in the hallway so we have to pass him every single time and sometimes he follows us into the bathroom), he stopped pissing and pooing anywhere but the bathroom!
He just chose to go in the shower because he can’t reach the toilet.
Unfortunately, we have to keep clearing his poo and pee before we have a shower and he gets very frustrated with us because every time we clean it, we’re effectively saying he’s not allowed to pee and poo there, and therefore he has nowhere to go toilet.
So then of course he’ll poo and pee outside of the shower as well as in the shower, using the entire bathroom floor as his toilet which makes it difficult for us to go in there and use the toilet ourselves.
I put a litter in the bathroom for him and it’s taken a couple of days but I think he’s coming around to the idea that this is his new place to go toilet because there is much less poo anywhere but the litter.
Although the chew mat I bought is completely intact for Rome, Paris’ is almost completely torn apart and non-existent.
Paris actually only chews the things we give him to chew and he knows EXACTLY which is for him and which is not.
A perfect example is that he has a cardboard box he chews on, we give them cardboard boxes a lot. Yet, I’ve left cardboard boxes full of my eBay stock out right next to his play area without any fences.
He can walk right up to them and start chewing on them, pissing on them, whatever he likes really and he leaves them untouched!
He has identified what is ok for him and what will get him into trouble and he really has behaved himself so we’ve removed the fence and he’s running “free range”.
He actually just stays in his area!! He’s recently started to explore under the couch but he has steered clear of the hallway and gone nowhere near the only fence that keeps him apart from Rome.
So far so good. Unsure how long this will last but we’ll see.
Paris has also started to approach us more and nudges us for treats which is much better than running away!
Still hates getting patted but he tolerates it a bit more before running away. He also has no problems standing on our feet when he’s begging and asking us for treats. We didn’t teach him, he just does it.
Overall we have 2 very happy bunnies and we’re finally starting to understand their personalities.
Because only their scent is on their stuff, they’re not marking territory as much as they used to.
That means there’s barely any poo outside of their litter and hutch and they’re not pissing outside of their designated litters at all. I knew they were supposed to be easy to toilet train!!
All they needed was to be separated and feel safe about what is THEIR space.
Our house no longer smells as bad (either that or I’m used to it) and I’m back to normal amounts of laundry.
That makes 2 good weeks in a row with them out of 5.5 weeks together. It was a hectic start but we’re getting there!! YES!!
Last thing… last night I attempted to feed them rocket (again, I think it was my 3rd attempt at feeding them rocket, probably the 15th time to attempt to feed them some sort of fresh veg) and THEY ATE IT!!!! That was their first ever fresh vegetable they’ve eaten.
And to test trust, I held the rocket with my mouth and had them eat it from me. BOTH of them did it which means they’re both cool with sharing food with me.
YES! After many weeks of rejection, I finally got acceptance.
I can’t have asked for more. Patience, persistence, trust and love. That’s what these boys are teaching me.
And restraint… I’m learning restraint. Sometimes I wish I could just SQUEEZE them and smother them with kisses because they’re so damned CUTE but that’s probably why they don’t let me hold them!
Here is a picture of them when they used to get along:
This is them in rapport even when separated.
Seriously, Tony skyped me one pic while he was with Paris in the lounge and Rome was doing the exact same thing while with me in the hallway! In rapport, even when apart – there is hope for them yet!
Since we separated the bunnies, there have been no dramas. All peace and quiet with lots of bunny kisses each day from Rome.
We bought them toys and chew mats, gave them little cardboard boxes which they use to chew, jump on and sleep in and bought them tubes to play in.
Yes, we had to buy 2 of everything so they each have one in their separate spaces. We ended up having to get them each a separate hay rack and water bottle.
We also bought them boxes that they can jump in and out of, dig in and use as litters. We also put hay in there so they have an incentive to jump in and out.
Overall I think they’re happy. I know Rome is.
I can’t work out if Paris is or not. He doesn’t do nearly as many binkies (a binky is their jump for joy, it’s a sign of their love for life), he still stays away from us and he likes to spend a lot of time in his hutch even when the door is open all day for him.
I let them out at 9am and don’t put them back in their hutch until 11pm. They’re supposed to get a minimum of 4 hours play time outside of their hutch.
These boys get 14 hours free time, though they do spend a lot of that time (from approx. 12-6pm) sleeping. The difference in personalities is amazing.
Even with 14 hours out each, Paris spends all his free time inside the hutch and doesn’t care if we close and lock the door. Rome wants out IMMEDIATELY and looks like he really wants to get out of jail.
I can’t tell if the wanting to stay in the hutch is Paris’ personality or if he is holding a grudge and really doesn’t like us. This boy is seriously hard to read and sure seems moody. Should have named him emo.
As for me and Tony, we’re good. We attend yoga occasionally and are not so hard-core about it anymore.
I’m loving the yin yoga. Since my whole being is very yang, yin just ensures I feel more balanced. Tony’s loving the vinyasa because it’s building up his arms. IMHO, his arms have never looked better!
Not going out so much ’cause I’m trading our going out money for buying the rabbits everything they need money.
It’s ok though ’cause we’ve had plenty to eat given Christmas and then Chinese New Year happened within a month of each other. Gong Hei Fat Choy 😉
And it’s ok we haven’t gone out much ’cause we’ve re-established order and stability with a lot more love at home.
It took 1 month. Not bad for a major change!
And that’s it. Life is peaceful, calm and simple again.
It’s not over yet, I’ve still got 9 hours to go but I am on my first ever 24 hours without Facebook.
Ever since I opened my account on Facebook back in 2007, I think I’ve been on it every single day.
It’s like a drug addiction and I was in denial.
These days, because I work on the computer a lot, from home and in my own hours, I just pop in and out of Facebook, whenever, which pretty much means ALL THE TIME.
If there is one place you’d be able to catch me at some point in the day, it would be Facebook.
BUT NOT FOR THE LAST 24 HOURS!!!!
Because you know what I did?
I DEACTIVATED MY ACCOUNT.
Yup. I deactivated it.
I don’t know why but in the last week I’ve noticed and disliked my attachment to Facebook. I’ve been using it as an escape the way one would use TV and I’ve been wasting hours of every day on it.
I tell people I don’t watch TV but I might as well be, with the number of animal videos, food videos and new invention videos I’ve watched through my feed.
The last straw was when I was supposed to go out to dinner the other day and instead of getting ready to leave the house, I found myself stuck to my seat and the computer because I’d prefer to mindlessly watch videos than get ready to go out and talk to people.
Then, after we got home, the first thing I did was log into Facebook to just watch things mindlessly yet again until 1am when I could have just gone to bed.
But WHY do I log into Facebook in the first place? For a multitude of reasons. I log on:
every time I don’t feel like working.
every time I feel inadequate and am looking for affirmation or validation.
each time I want proof that I don’t lead a meaningless existence.
every time I want to send someone a message – my attempt at reaching out and maintaining friendships.
to share random thoughts I would say out loud if someone was physically around to hear them.
because I’m waiting for a reply to something I’ve written to someone and I want to check if they’ve come back to me yet.
for something to do because I don’t feel like doing much else, aka procrastination.
to keep updated on the latest news (which is mostly rubbish)
any time I feel anxious about doing the next task because it might be too hard.
But you know what? That list already means I log onto Facebook at least 9 times a day. Yes, I login and then logout and then login and then logout. I thought having to physically keep logging in and out would stop me but it hasn’t.
Deactivation has stopped me though. I think the action to reactivate is exactly the same. All I have to do is log back in but mentally, a “deactivated account” actually is deterring me from going back.
I feel a sense of relief.
So what is life like without Facebook? I can’t remember because I have to think back to the days before 2007.
I’ll tell you what though, I’ve done a LOT. I think so far, up to the time of writing this, I’ve only had 15 hours off from FB and that included 7 hours of sleep.
Last week’s blog was on completions and well, I completed over 30 tasks yesterday. I had 30 things on my list to do today and I’m down to 16 (including going to the bank and dropping off a parcel).
I’m enjoying my freedom and new found time so far. I wonder how long this will last 😉
Back in circa 2000, I met this guy at a personal development seminar. It was my very first personal development seminar.
They asked us to introduce ourselves to our “buddies” ie the person sitting next to us who we were to spend the rest of our 5 days with.
The purpose of a buddy? He/she was your accountability partner and the one we would do all our exercises with.
I turned and next to me was this rather quirky character, almost 20 years my senior.
I won’t say much about him right now other than to say, he was an eccentric artist and I couldn’t believe I ended up with THIS guy out of all the 500 or so in the room and my first reaction was, “why did I end up sitting next to HIM?!”
We were the most unlikely of buddies, I never in a lifetime would have ever befriended him under any normal circumstances but I’m so grateful that he was my buddy because I learned many life lessons from him.
We remained buddies and good friends for years, right up to me being in London (2007). Then we lost touch.
In the time we stayed connected, he taught me many things, one of which was something he called “Completions”, I believe this to be Landmark terminology.
Every day he’d make a goal to have 5 completions and every day, he’d tell me what completions he did.
Every day I had no idea what he was talking about nor why it was important to him but all I knew was that my job was to make sure he ticked his goals off the list and if he accomplished HIS goal then I’d been a good buddy.
Well, I finally get it, almost 20 years later! But again, he was 20 years my senior and now that I’m about the age he was then, I do actually get it.
So, completions – to complete something is to resolve a problem, to close off a loop, to tie up loose ends, to finish something that was started. AND IT FEELS SO GOOD. No wonder he aimed for 5 a day.
You see, for every loop we leave open, for every problem unresolved, it leaves the mind constantly working to close it, to find an ending, to find some sort of resolution – this is mind chatter. Noise.
Emotions linger and go around and around our bodies. We think and over think then rethink and then think again and a lot of it is completely unnecessary. Actually, none of it would be there, if we just closed the loop.
So that’s what I’ve been doing. Closing loops. I can’t even explain to you how easy life is when you do that. Give it a go and you’ll know what I mean. It brings so much clarity and sanity!
If a decision needs to be made, decide. If a question is asked, answer. If a problem is created, find a solution and resolve it.
If something keeps dragging on, identify the person, system, company, thing that’s causing the drag and disrupting the flow to the end goal and attempt resolution there.
If it’s not possible or within your timeframe, replace that bit with a person, system, company, thing that will allow for quick and easy resolution and work with them instead.
If that doesn’t work, leave it, throw it, come back to it later, or don’t. Some things need persistence however, there are some things that cannot be fixed and are not for you to fix. These problems call for acceptance. Acceptance also closes a loop.
Life is too short to be spending it, sitting in unresolved problems.
Dr Demartini says that the longest any person should ever need to go through grief is 3 hours.
I’m thinking, if grief only needs 3 hours, then surely many other problems can be resolved just as quickly, if not faster!
Although morbid, I often have this thought: “If I died today, what would I be leaving Tony with having to deal with? What things have I left undone? What things have I left in a disorganised state? When I’m gone, what will his life be like as a direct impact of my actions or inactions?”
So every day I’m closing loops. Each day that passes, the less and less mess and problems I leave him (and myself) with.
With every new problem that arises, the faster I deal with it. The more I eliminate things I don’t want from my life, the less they turn up. Eventually they just never turn up at all, leaving space for all the things I do want.
Someone asked me and Tony once. “So when you’re in the yoga room, what do you think of?” Both of us actually looked at each other, then looked back at her blankly. We both answered, “Nothing.”
Do you know how good that feels? To realise that you have moments in time where you can just sit there and think of absolutely nothing!
No worries, no troubles, no anxieties, no fears, no guilt, no lists, no problems to resolve, no things to do, no dramas, no plans, no mindless empty chatter….. just…. nothing.
That’s what happens when you do completions.
You become calm, clear, content, present…complete.